I spend a lot of my time looking for writing ideas in my free time and I found one that really caught my interest: If you could go back in time to 16 years of age with all the knowledge you currently possess what would you do/what would you say to your 16 year old self? So, with this writing prompt in mind, I said that I’d write a letter to my 16 year old self.
Here, walking anxiety attack waiting to happen, shut up and listen for a second. Yes I said that and it’s true, don’t deny it. Harsh, yes. Fair, also yes. We are our own worst critic and you already know that. Now breathe. Life isn’t a complete sh*t show, even though it sure as hell feels like it right now, and it gets better the longer you go, trust me.
1. Ignore the girls who always say they haven’t studied and the ones who have detailed study plans. That shit doesn’t work for you. You already know the best way to learn and, yeah, it works for no one else but it works for you. Write it again and again until you can practically see it when you dream. It worked for Latin lyrics with your choir teacher and I still remember them 11 years later. Stick to what you know works and you’ll be fine. You’re doing just fine the way you are even if everyone else thinks what you’re doing is a little bit very odd.
2. I know you haven’t had a boyfriend yet but don’t sweat it. You’ll learn that people lie about who they’ve hooked up with and you’re not weird for not being interested in going out with the girls. It’s not fun being the youngest in the group but you have focus and drive and, yeah, you’ll miss out on all the “mad nights out” (that really weren’t that mad in hindsight to be honest) but there’s more important things in life to focus on. Love is important but it doesn’t define who you are, only you can do that. Don’t change for people; they’ll try, believe me, but be you. Be weird and like what you like. Don’t like something just because someone else does.
3. And while I’m at it, you deserve the attention that you don’t want to ask for! Don’t be afraid to stand alone even when you’re in a relationship, you don’t always need to hold someone’s hand. That insecurity is their problem, not yours. And to learn a lesson; step away, look at the situation without your emotions involved and you’ll be amazed what you can learn and don’t lie to yourself, you can separate your emotions from your opinions, it’ll help you a lot when you need to remove your own personal biases. 100% blunt honesty but only when people ask for it. Some people will appreciate it; others not so much.
4. Don’t study music. Love it with all your heart and soul, stay in choir and learn to sight read (kind of) and listen to all kinds of music, old and new. But, for the love of all that is holy, don’t study music! It’s not as much fun as you think. And when you get to college and do your masters, you’re right Ian Dempsey has great taste in Irish music. Trust me, you’ll know it when you hear it. Enjoy it, don’t be afraid to talk to the people you meet in Galway outside of college, make friends. Some people will have a big impact on your life, you’ll owe them more than they or you will realise in that moment.
5. When they finally make their appearances: The Coronas, Mumford & Sons and Imagine Dragons are a must. Keep them always and forever, they are the best and that won’t change for a long, long time and, the two I’ve seen live, really are that amazing but always keep listening you never know when something/someone new might appear.
6. Speaking of Galway, you’ll meet plenty of people in college. Some of them are hilarious. Keep an eye out for a group of anime watching nerds. You’ll make some amazing friends there. Your parabatai [you’ll understand when you’re older 😛 I know you hate that line XD], your brothers from other mothers and some of the most wonderful characters in your life, even if some of them are more unusual than others and will stick in your brain forever. And, yes, you’ll love that name just because the person attached to it was such a stand out personality.
7. Things can always get better. When you’re at the very bottom the only way to go is up. Keep your nails short, don’t ask just do. Yes, they look pretty but you don’t need them. Also you are not an open book, you will need to literally tell some people how you feel by the way. Things might seem pretty crap at 16 and I know you won’t want to celebrate your birthday for years to come but good times are not always followed by bad. Don’t be afraid to have fun because some thing could go wrong.
8. Support your own. Yes, they may not be what you call fabulous but even being there is supporting them. Loyalty is homegrown. You know that loyalty is important, don’t lose that but don’t let it blind you either. You are more aware of things going on around you than people believe a) keep that to yourself and b) forgive if you feel inclined to but never, ever, ever forget. Loyalty doesn’t mean following blindly. Be loyal to those who return the favour, first and foremost, then to those you think have earned it.
After that, it’s all on you. Good luck. With all the love that I can give my 16 year old self,
From Emma (27 years old) x
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